


Strength of Character

by Laylah



Category: Homestuck
Genre: First Time, Healthy Communication, Homestuck Kink Meme, M/M, Mangrit, Podfic Available, Xeno, derp is a superpower
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-27
Updated: 2011-03-27
Packaged: 2017-10-17 07:32:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/174403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laylah/pseuds/Laylah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Polite, a natural leader, and unusually strong. John is certainly a human worth paying further attention to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strength of Character

**Author's Note:**

> For a homesmut prompt:
> 
> _I would like to see this pairing dynamic so bad. As we know John is apparently a ~strong boy~, given what his dad's said. I would like to see a fic wherein Equius finds out that John is STRONG like him, and therefore able to stand up to his IMMENSE STRENGTH just fine!_
> 
> ETA: Podfic by Rhea available here: It's here: http://amplificathon.dreamwidth.org/2016642.html

For all of Equius's misgivings about working together with the humans, it is less of a strain than he expected. The one called Dave is as obnoxious and crass as his obscene type color initially suggested, but the females help to keep him in check. And the one called John is...confusing. Interesting.

He has an easygoing demeanor that would make him in high demand as an auspistice between trolls; even Vantas's most virulent ranting seems to roll off him ineffectually. At times he seems too easily entertained by frivolous things, but when they address serious issues he always contributes in kind. The others treat him as a leader, Equius determines eventually. It's less obvious than it would be among trolls, but all of the other humans place faith in his ideas and support his decisions.

Equius does not, therefore, particularly mind being part of an exploration team with him. They are divided into four teams of four, scouting these ruins they now share in search of resources. Vriska believes she is leading this team, which Equius does not contest; the argument would be not worth the time. She selected John as the human to accompany their team, and Equius asked Nepeta to be their fourth. There is a practical reason for it, since she is a capable fighter, quick and agile, but truthfully he is loath to leave his moirail behind when they don't know how dangerous the situation will be.

Nepeta, drat her, understands this immediately, and wastes no time explaining the nature of their bond to John. Which would be bad enough, but then he seems to want to encourage her. "That sounds pretty neat," he says, walking beside her through the ruined corridors. Vriska leads with their lantern and Equius is guarding their rear. "Karkat wasn't very clear about how all this troll romance stuff works."

"No," Nepeta says mournfully. "Karkitty doesn't have a lot of patience fur explaining."

John _giggles_. "Karkitty," he repeats. "I bet he gets really mad when you call him that."

"Vantas displays unseemly rage at everything," Equius says. "But his ire toward Nepeta is unacceptable."

"He's not that bad," Nepeta pouts.

"No, it's true," John says, looking back at Equius. Vriska is surely entertained by all this. "He's kind of a jerk sometimes, but under all that—"

"This is not necessary," Equius says. "We do not require an auspistice."

John looks confused. "He means he doesn't hate Karkitty that much," Nepeta says.

"Well, that's good, then," John says. Equius is forced to agree. It would be beneath him to devote such intensity of emotion to someone so utterly without refinement.

Before the conversation can veer once more into uncomfortably intimate territory, Vriska interrupts from the fore. "The path is blocked up here," she says. "There's a door leading onward, but it has a pillar fallen across it."

Equius steps forward, expecting his strength to be required, but John is ahead of him and gets there first. "Looks tough," John says, "but it shouldn't be too bad." He stoops down to get a grip on the fallen pillar and lifts. He grunts with the effort, but he makes the pillar move, lifting the entire stone column and pushing it upright, out of the way of the door.

It's impolite, but Equius stares as much as the other two. "Wow," Nepeta says. Vriska nods.

"What?" John asks, turning back to them. He looks confused by their attention.

Equius clears his throat. "Would you say that you are exceptionally strong, for a human?"

"Uh." John looks from them to the pillar and back again. "I guess so, yeah. My dad always said he expected me to grow up to be pretty strong. My guardian, I mean," he clarifies. "Kind of like a lusus."

"They would have figured that out," Vriska says. "You don't need to coddle everyone all the time."

"Sorry," John says, though he doesn't sound cowed. "I'm just trying to be culturally sensitive."

"Your efforts are appreciated," Equius says. Polite, a natural leader, and unusually strong. John is certainly a human worth paying further attention to.

* * *

They're actually all getting along pretty okay, now that they've had some time to get used to each other. And now that they've done some exploring together and set up living quarters for everyone. It's like a big team-building exercise, right? Or like in the movies when people learn to trust each other because they've gone through so much rough stuff as a group. At this point, John thinks they have a pretty good chance of a happy ending.

He's taking a little time to relax with Rose, practicing his card tricks—which is maybe not the best idea with captchalogue cards, but he hasn't lost anything yet—when Nepeta comes bounding into the room and skids to a halt sitting on the table in front of them. Well, the crate they're using as a table. "Hi, Nepeta," John says. "What's up?"

"I had an impurrtant question fur you," she says, but she's staring at Rose, squirming a little bit and focusing hard.

Rose covers up her knitting before Nepeta can decide to pounce on the yarn. "Go ahead," she says. "What did you want to ask?"

Nepeta fixes John with a squinty look that's probably supposed to be very serious. "This is a matter of utmost impurrtance," she says. "What are your intentions toward my meowrail?"

John blinks. " _What_?" he says. Sure, he's been trying to be friendly with the trolls, and now that he thinks about it, Equius has been paying more attention to him since they went exploring together, but—

"Don't purrtend innocence!" Nepeta says. "You see him all the time! You have to know he's flushed fur you."

"Um," John says. "I'm really flattered?" Which is more or less true. Equius doesn't seem to like very many people, so it's kind of an honor to be one of the ones who makes the cut, he supposes. "But like I told Karkat, I'm not a homosexual."

Nepeta gives him a blank stare.

"Oh honestly, John," Rose says. "Neither am I."

"Wait, what?" John says, looking over at her. "But you and Kanaya—"

"That's exactly what I mean," Rose says. She puts on what John thinks of as her psychology face, all serious, her lips pinched just a little bit. "Sexuality isn't as simple as that, even if you aren't a troll. Some people like both, or neither, and often it changes over the course of someone's lifetime. You're still young, and our circumstances, you must admit, are extremely unusual. Stranger things have already happened than your potential discovery that your sexuality is multifaceted."

John frowns. "You want me to go out with Equius?" he says.

Rose rolls her eyes. "I would like to see you display some capacity for self-awareness and self-examination," she says. "Question your own assumptions rather than accepting them blindly. Whether that leads you to new romantic horizons is of relatively little concern to me."

"Oh," John says. He looks back at Nepeta, and she looks confused. No, wait—she looks _purrturbed_. "Sorry! I guess I don't have an answer for you right now. I'll have to think about it for a while."

Nepeta sighs dramatically. "Human romance sure is complicated."

* * *

Equius has begun to suspect that John is paying him particular attention. He is by turns flustered and flattered, both of which have the unfortunate effect of making him sweat. John displays his nobility of spirit by paying it no mind, conversing with Equius without drawing any attention to the unseemly display.

"So this thing about blood is really important to you, huh," John says, walking back to the common room with him when yet another attempt to coax respectability out of Gamzee has failed.

"Of course," Equius says. "The hemospectrum both influences our temperaments and structures all of troll society. It is central to the imposition of order on our race."

John nods thoughtfully. "Even now?" he says. "I mean, when there are only twelve of you left?"

"Especially now," Equius says. "Descending into chaos would only ensure our doom."

"I guess I don't entirely get it," John says. "Since it's a cultural thing and I'm not one of you. But I'm glad you're working on keeping everyone together."

"Thank you," Equius says awkwardly. His skin prickles as he considers where all of the humans would fall on the hemospectrum. "Of course we, ah, will have to make _some_ allowances, now that our races are to be living together."

"Yeah," John says. "It's kind of a big adjustment for everybody!" He smiles; Equius doesn't think he's ever seen a troll smile the way John does, broad and open, expressing delight at something other than the downfall of a rival. "We'll pull through, though! We've made it this far by putting our strengths together. I'm sure we'll be okay."

Equius's face flushes hot. He has no doubt that John didn't intend to imply anything as lewd as that sounded, but when their strength is the thing the two of them have in common....

"Whoa," John says, reaching out to him—to _him_! When even most other trolls would avoid him in a state like this. "Are you okay? Did I say something wrong?"

"I would...prefer not to explain," Equius hedges. "Unless you insist."

"Well, okay," John says. Then he smiles again. "Unless you want me to insist."

Sweat runs down the back of Equius's neck and soaks into his collar. "I would not complain."

"I guess I'm insisting, then," John says.

"As you wish," Equius says. "While I am certain you did not intend any lewd implications, I am by far the strongest of the surviving trolls, and you have demonstrated unusual strength for a human, so suggesting the combination...." He swallows hard. "Forgive me for reading such impropriety into your words."

"Haha, wow, yeah," John says. "It does sound pretty bad, once you point that out." He blushes, too, his pale cheeks turning pink, and Equius would describe his expression as coy if it seemed more knowing; instead it's...what is halfway between coy and apologetic? Humans have such a strange array of emotions. "Sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"It's nothing," Equius begins, but he cuts himself off when John starts talking again also:

"I mean, I—I guess it's sort of on both of our minds lately."

For a moment Equius can't believe he heard that correctly. "I'm sorry?" he says. "You have been...thinking of...?"

John makes the nearly apologetic face again. "I wasn't at first," he says. "But then Nepeta said you liked me—"

" _What?_ "

"—and Rose said, well, I think what she said was that I should be more willing to try new things, so I've been thinking about that. Whether I would be, uh, willing to." His face is a deep pink by now.

Later, Equius thinks, he will have to yell at Nepeta about this. Quite a lot. And demand that she remove this possibility from her ludicrous shipping wall, where she has no doubt installed it by now. "And?" he says. "Ah, would you?"

John fidgets, not looking directly at him. "Well, I think I'd kind of want to take it slow, because I'm not totally sure what I want yet." He catches his lip between his teeth for a moment, then goes on: "But I'm curious."

"Caution is understandable," Equius says. "Romantic entanglements can be difficult." He can scarcely believe his own audacity. "Would you like to adjourn to my respiteblock and—" No, visitors never appreciate his art; he doesn't want to harm his chances—"or perhaps yours would be better, and we could, ah...."

"See how it goes?" John says. "Yeah. Okay."

* * *

They go to his room instead of Equius's—John figures Equius's room is probably a mess or something. He seems like the kind of guy who would worry about that. Hopefully he won't be too disappointed that John's room is kind of messy too.

He doesn't say anything about the mess, though. Instead he looks at the posters John has alchemized up to keep the walls from being so bare and gloomy. "These are advertisements for Earth movies?"

John beams. "Yeah," he says. Equius is frowning thoughtfully at Nicolas Cage's rugged look of determination in _Con Air_. "That one's my favorite! I think you'd really like it. It's about this guy who's been wrongfully imprisoned and he's on a plane with all these really dangerous criminals and—anyway, it's awesome. We should watch it sometime." He's chattering like a nervous goof, isn't he? "Uh. We don't have to."

Equius is looking at him like he's just done something really nice, though. "I would be happy to," he says, all serious.

Right. They're getting the hang of it, but trolls in general are still pretty bad at being friends. They'll have to keep working on that! "Maybe not right this minute, I guess. Since we're here to, uh." John fidgets.

"Indeed." Equius is blushing—it is still so weird to see all the different colors that trolls can blush—and he's breaking out in a sweat again. John thinks he should have made sure to stock up on some towels on the way here. Whoops. He'll have to remember that next time!

He takes a step forward, and Equius does too, and this is the point where if they were in a movie they'd have music starting to swell in the background, because they're just about close enough to touch. John wishes he'd thought of music, too, because the tips of Equius's ears are curled down in this way that looks kind of nervous. But stopping now would make it more awkward, he's pretty sure, so instead he reaches out and takes Equius's hand.

"I feel I should warn you," Equius says hoarsely—does that count as a pun?—"that I have...very little experience in these matters, and that largely with a robot."

John blinks. "Haha, wow," he says. Trolls really are different. "Well, me neither, with robots or anything else! But, uh, let's give it a try." He's still not entirely sure how he feels about doing this, but he's not _against_ the idea, and Rose is right that this is a pretty unusual situation. And no matter how logical Karkat's shipping grid was, it still doesn't seem very likely that things will work out that way.

Okay, here they go. John leans up a little bit—Equius is a few inches taller than he is—and tilts his head to the left a little so they won't bump noses and then their lips touch. Equius is holding really, really still, so John leans into him a little more, and then the frames of their glasses collide with an awkward click and one of the little cushiony bits for the bridge of his nose almost pokes John in the eye.

"Ow," he says, pulling back. Equius flinches. "Um," John says. He reaches up to take his glasses off. "Can you take yours off too?"

"I—yes," Equius says uncertainly. He takes his sunglasses off with slow, super-careful movements, and he actually looks kind of weird at first! He pretty much always has them on. His eyes are ordinary troll gold, even if they have dark circles under them like he doesn't sleep enough. He looks like less of a badass without the sunglasses, but not _much_ less, with his teeth all jagged and the one snapped-off horn and all those muscles.

John takes both of their glasses and puts them down on a table out of the way. "Okay," he says. "You want to try that again?"

Equius nods. This time he tilts his head, too, and they get the angle right a lot faster. Even though he's so tough, his lips are still soft against John's, and John closes his eyes because that's what you're supposed to do when you kiss, right? It feels pretty nice. Not, like, triumphant orchestral crescendo or anything, but nice.

John opens his mouth a little, carefully, trying to get the hang of this kissing thing. His tongue brushes the seam of Equius's lips and for a second he wonders if he's breaking his own rules about taking it slow, but then Equius opens his mouth a little bit, too, so it's probably okay. He tastes sort of interesting, sweet-sour, not quite like anything else John can think of. John leans in a little closer so they're actually pressed up against each other, and wraps his arms around Equius's waist. He still feels like he's doing most of the work here, but when he pushes into the kiss a little harder Equius finally starts to kiss back.

Equius's tongue presses into John's mouth, tongue curling against his, one hand wrapping around John's bicep, and suddenly wow. It's a lot more exciting like that. A little shiver runs down John's spine when he feels the sharp points of Equius's claws graze his skin, and he makes a noise in his throat without really meaning to.

And then suddenly Equius pulls back. John opens his eyes and sees Equius staring at him with eyes wide and...panicky looking. "I'm sorry," Equius says. "That was careless. I—"

"What are you talking about?" John says. "That was just starting to get good!"

It probably wouldn't be nice to laugh at the face Equius makes then, so John bites the inside of his cheek and tries to keep a straight face. "I didn't hurt you?"

"Nope," John says. "Actually I'd really like it if you did that again."

"Is that...an order?" Equius says.

It must be okay to at least _smile_ at that part. John hopes so, anyway, because he can't help it. "I'd rather not give any orders when I'm still figuring stuff out," he says. "After that, um...maybe. But not right now, okay?"

Equius nods. "As you wish," he says. Which sounds a little too much like the kind of thing you say when you're following orders, but then John decides he'll just think of it like Equius is quoting Westley from _The Princess Bride_ , and—wait actually that's still kind of too intense. Never mind.

"So...take three?" John asks.

"Take three," Equius agrees.

 _This_ time, they've got the hang of it for real. The kiss is deep and wet and Equius actually gets a little pushy after a minute, and he makes some pretty great noises when John holds him tighter for that. They're both clinging to each other this time, touching, and when Equius slips a hand up under John's shirt, claws just barely touching skin, they're starting to move into swelling orchestral territory. Or swelling something, anyway! John's pants feel tighter than they did a minute ago, that's for sure.

They overbalance after a minute and John stumbles, but really that just makes him laugh, and Equius chuckles a little, too. "You, um...here," John says, taking Equius's hand and tugging him toward the bed. "Can't fall over if we're already lying down, right?"

"If your recuperation platform is reinforced enough for my strength—"

"It'll be fine," John says. He pulls Equius down onto the bed with him and okay it creaks a little, but it doesn't seem too likely to break. They'll just have to, uh, not do anything too...vigorous. John blushes like crazy, and kisses Equius again so he won't have to explain why.

It's way easier to get close like this. Their legs are tangled together and they're both kind of exploring with their hands—John has pretty much no fingernails at all, but he can just barely manage to scratch Equius's back when he tries, and _wow_ does that get some neat reactions. Then Equius kisses his throat and bites just a tiny bit and it's John's turn to whimper and squirm. He retaliates by going for Equius's ears—he's got pointy ears, like an elf or a Vulcan, and John tries biting one lobe to see how that goes, and Equius's moan is half sound and half hot breath against John's skin, and wow.

They both decide their shirts need to go at about the same time, and Equius tears his in a hurry to get it off, but he doesn't stop to look embarrassed about that which makes it actually kind of hot. Trolls have no nipples, John discovers. At least male trolls don't. But the muscle shapes are pretty similar between the two of them, and Equius's skin is warm and smooth, and the fine bluish sheen of his sweat really just makes them slide against each other easily when John pulls him close and rocks against him again.

Because by now this is...this is really starting to go somewhere in particular. John's dick is really hard, and when he rubs up against Equius he can feel Equius's...bone bulge, he supposes. He needs to get used to the troll words for things, right?

All the same he's not going to bring up the bucket thing unless Equius does it first, because he really doesn't want to have to stop in the middle and go look for apparatus when things are getting this good.

"I know I said I wanted to go slow," John says, "but, uh, are you good with...?" Oh god it's still so hard to say. He catches hold of the waistband of Equius's shorts and tugs a little.

"You want me to undress," Equius says, and he certainly _sounds_ like he thinks that's a good idea.

"If you want to," John says. "Yeah. Um. Both of us."

Equius nods. "I would...I would 'be good' with that."

John kicks his shoes off and starts on the buttons of his jeans, and beside him Equius gets to work stripping his clothes off, too, and once Equius's elbow catches John in the ribs, which makes John huff a little _oof_ but it doesn't really hurt, and Equius looks relieved enough that he might cry. John really doesn't want to make him cry.

And then they're naked, and he forgets about the other stuff. Equius's dick—bone bulge, man, it's hard to remember to call it that—is blue, which makes sense but it's still weird to see, and he doesn't have any pubes and John kind of wonders if that's natural or if he shaves but oh god it would be weird to stop and ask biology questions now and he's babbling inside his head. And staring.

When he looks up again, Equius is blushing pretty hard. His cheeks are almost as blue as his—anyway, he looks nervous. "Sorry," John says. "I'm being kind of weird, huh? Here, um. Is this okay?" He reaches out to touch, and Equius shivers, nodding as John's fingertips slide up his thigh.

It's really hard not to just think of it as his dick. It's like how Karkat calls the bathtub an ablution trap. Trolls just use funny words for things.

Anyway, dick or bone bulge or whatever, John wraps his hand around Equius's and Equius moans like that's amazing. "Wow," John says, settling in against his side. He strokes slowly, getting used to the feel of it—differently shaped than his, and he thinks the texture of troll skin isn't quite like human skin, but it's hard to explain what the difference is, and anyway it feels good.

Equius wraps one arm around him, pulling him carefully closer. "This is all right?"

John nods. He shifts a little so his dick presses against Equius's hip. "Yeah, it's good." He lowers his head and kisses the knob of bone in Equius's shoulder. "I'll tell you if anything's uncomfortable, okay? It's fine." It must have been really hard for Equius, growing up like that, so strong that he couldn't even touch anyone.

But they're taking care of that now, right? John leans into Equius, trying to keep his rhythm steady—Equius keeps rocking up into his hand, which is pretty hot, and his breathing sounds raw and kind of shaky. "Oh," he says, "yes—please—"

"Yeah," John says, "I got you, don't worry," and he's kind of rocking his hips too, grinding against Equius's hip, because wow this is exciting and he doesn't want to wait his turn, and the friction's good and Equius is getting really tense against him, holding on tight—maybe tight enough to be a little uncomfortable, and maybe his claws are going to leave marks, but John doesn't want to stop him now—and when Equius comes that's light blue, too, and there's really a lot of it, really, wow.

He opens his eyes and gives John this look like he can't believe that just happened and he's super grateful, so John smiles at him. "Thank you," he says, "John. You...."

"No problem," John says, pushing a little harder against Equius's hip. Equius's come is dripping down onto his dick and making it slippery, and he chews on his lip, because that feels good, and like he just wants to—"Help me out?" he says.

"Of course," Equius says. "Yes. Of course." He reaches down and John kind of rolls half on top of him, bracing both hands against the bed as Equius takes hold of his dick—really gently, like he's still afraid his strength is dangerous.

So John says, "Harder, please," and pushes into it when Equius's grip tightens and then it's _amazing_ , hot and firm and come-slippery, and it really only takes like thirty seconds of that before John is whimpering and shuddering and coming in Equius's hand.

His arms don't really want to hold him up after that so he just lets himself flop down on the bed, still halfway tangled up with Equius, and there's a squelching noise from all the mess they've made, and John can't help giggling. For a second Equius tenses up but then he must get it, because he starts to laugh too, quietly, like a secret, and the way his shoulders shake makes John feel really warm and happy all the way through. He's _really_ going to need to change the sheets, and thinking that makes him laugh more—and then hug Equius, hard, because wow, having orgasms with someone else is _great_.

"That...was more successful than I expected," Equius says, giving John this crooked, broken-toothed smile that's actually pretty adorable.

"Yeah," John says. "It was really nice."

Somehow Equius seems to be sweating _less_ now than he was when they were just getting started, but John feels like he's overheating a little, so he summons the wind—just a tiny bit—to cool them off. Equius sighs in contentment as the breeze blows over them both.

Man, Rose is going to be totally insufferable when John has to admit she was right, but he figures he'll live with that somehow. Turns out sometimes it's not bad being complicated after all.


End file.
